Thursday, July 26, 2007

Squid Vs. Unicorn

Edwina is here, and I am a happy camper, except for the times I have to rip myself away from her to go work. I have new eyes towards everything in my life, and everyone has been so amazing to her (naturally, as she is amazing and my friends are wonderful). The only bad thing is the fact that my car is exploding. I described it to my dad, who diagnosed it as a clogged PCV valve, which is causing my engine to burn oil and evaporate it all over itself. This sucks. Oh well, Dick Donovan will fix it. I have faith.
I was initially worried about her being left to her own devices while I was at work, as she'll be here for 3 weeks, but, naturally, she's making friends and is very good at entertaining herself. Also, with the length of her stay, having time apart will be a benefit to both of us in the long run.
I have to stop writing now because Eric Carlson is fucking it up.
Bye!
Addendum: Dear Gertrudex2... Your life is worthless, as is life in general. May these moments of woe be engrained painfully into the depths of your shallow soul. Remember the anguish that is everyday, and pray that you will someday have the courage to bless our earth by cleansing away the wretched stain of life your life truly is.

xoxo
etc

EXCUSE ME, MR., my horoscope says you are wrong:
"the sublime can only be glimpsed by pressing through fear's boundary, beyond one's previous conceptions of the beautiful. That's a good theme for you to experiment with right now, Aries. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you're very close to making contact with splendor you'll remember all your life. (And I don't use the fancy word splendor lightly). You'll need a lot of playful courage to make the boundary-crossing. But I know you can do it if you keep heading in the direction of what's scarily meaningful."

I think that pretty much sums it up.
KtP


...
Ummm. your faith and hope is inspired by the back of the City Pages? Case n Point. End that shit.

........
I, however, prefer to think that I can find joy in a crappy scrap of paper I found in the bin. There's meaning in everything and I am on a mission to find it ALL. It's mine! My burning life force will overtake your gloomy cafe pirating.

...
Isn't that cute. Life force and star maps and a gleaming sphere of epic bullshit. Its nice being happy isnt it... until you realize your smile is a frail mask and a continuously failing attempt to imagine that things are all right. You'll soon awake to a beatiful day. Birds will sing as they sit upon a golden rainbow unicorn. A smile will split your face in two and you'll finally understand. The .45 is in the closet. Fully Loaded. You stand upon the random so and so you woke up next to. He wakes up to the barrel of your salvation. You save his life by ending it. You then save yours.
:)

..........
Random so and so? I don't think so. I am the last bastion of true love. My heart is swollen with the unabated will to make someone else's life as beautiful as mine, and that so and so will be nothing but lucky to make the most meager contact with me and my untainted soul.
How is this going to end? I think we've reached an impasse. You're just too dark. Don't talk to me.

...........
You lie to yourself to postpone the inevitable.

...........
Oh right, dying alone in the woods, brambles in my hair. The return to nature. I forgot about that part.

...........
Suicide bomb. Mall of America.

peace.
I'm out.

Monday, July 16, 2007

To Bemidji and Beyond!

Went up to the ancestral manse with my Grandma and Jesse Russell in tow. Drive made me tired after long, stressful day at work. Crashed on the couch immediately upon arrival. I'd lost the keys to my boss' house Thursday, which more or less gave me an anxiety attack, then had to spend the whole day with him, feeling like a total delinquent. As a result I am on a mission to be home by 11 every weeknight, and to imbibe on weekends only, and in moderation. Yes yes I will be a real adult. Also, as a result of this real-adult-ness, I am now a thousand-aire. That feels pretty sweet.
Went shopping with my tri-generational crew (Ma, Gma), and attended Emily Hagge's bridal shower. Holy crap so much estrogen, fueled by champagne. Lots of 'so are you dating anyone? Who are you bringing to the wedding?' and the dreaded 'Are you and Jesse going to get back together?' Alas. I told them I was bringing a bum I found on the street. And this is just the beginning.
Saturday night Jesse and I went to the outer reaches of civilization, Puposky, to revel with Alex and Genevieve. Bought beer on credit, simply by stating that I was Lisa Peterson's daughter. 'If we can't trust Lisa Peterson we might as well just shut down.' Good to know my ma is held in high regard at such highly esteemed establishments as Noelle's Bottle Shop. Out in Puposky went tearing around on backwoods trails in the dark in a Geo Tracker with a grill and chains on the tires. Ramming down dead trees and rolling around in the back, which is sans-seats, while going over every type of bump and fallen tree imaginable. I love the Belleveau manor more than anything. Sat on a haybale in a field after a brief stop at a friendly Rez Bar known as Dale's. Back to MPLS next day, ready for another week. This time I'm getting serious. SERIOUS.

Sunday, July 8, 2007

Multilayered Overview

Stuck at the shop, with rain pouring down.
The thought of soggy shoes makes this vaguely tolerable.
We all hold out here together, and my weekends are mine,
though my body insists on thwarting me.
That could be my fault.
At the moment, trapped in a feeling I'm sure many have felt before me,
not wanting to feel, but wanting much more to experience.
It's like the hangman's noose.
I could just slip out and walk away,
but I like the roughness and weight around my neck,
I want to give in to it's obligation,
Spinster Death, holding out for the possiblity of
someone coming to cut me down.
But for now I'll stand on tip-toe, with the stool
wobbling below.
All the while making merry, smiling and throwing things.
Working hard or hardly working? Eh buddy?
Dipping my toe down from the stool into the murky but
somehow promising waters of adulthood.
And what will be will be.

Friday, July 6, 2007

I Suck at Blogging Lately

But my brother doesn't. Check him out at his myspace page, 'Chief Wandering Echo.' It's on my profile.
Dude blows my mind. Jambone Slamhammer, the one, the only, etc etc.
As for Me (because that's what this is all about, right?), I am doing very well, by all accounts, though I've been feeling a little irritable during the last few days. Maybe it's mom withdrawal. Or the two week stint of drunkeness/not sleeping. Just maybe. But I'm getting shit back in order, starting right now. I didn't go out last night. Yes, I know. Thank you, thank you.
New job is good. I'm at it right now. Chris is talking to some big client who has $2 mil of art for sale, that we apparently want to buy. I don't know, I'm not really filled in on that biz yet. I mostly just file things and make orders for toner cartridges and stuff. But we have been doing some inventory stuff and putting together a 100th anniversary collection of Curtis' photography, mostly portfolio photograveurs. They're pretty.
AND I'm all moved into my new apartment, contrary to my previous report about August. Fuck that, I'm out! It rules. Although I did lock myself out on the 4th of July. It was an adventure. Actually this whole last week has been an adventure. Went to 4 parties with Anna, capped it all off with skinny dippin in Lake Calhoun in the full moon night. 'Like swimming in God's piss.' Got up and moved my life the next day. Went to work. Hung out with my mom all day monday. She is a trooper and a half. 1/2 way through our Ikea rampage, 'My beer meter is going off. We gotta get out of here!' Mommy. Got Chang Mai takeout and gossiped about skanks. Drank High Life and got dolled up to go out. Went to Memory Lanes.
'Hey Katie.'
'Who are you?'
'Jeff. We made out?'
'Oh. This is my mom.'
That was a good start to our night. Ma mingled like the pro she is and dissected my friend's relationships with Anna, although the catch is that she did it right in front of them. That was funny. Hung out with Bennett, Sheila, et al at the Hex, went back to Mem. Lanes where she was romanced by Matty Torbinson. On and on. In short, it was fun.
Planning another rib fest for August.
Hm, what else? Tuesday night I went out for my first ever drink with a coworker, Ulises, the masseuse. Hilarious. 2 double Jameson's deep, talkin bout life and bitching out co-workers. Wtf.
What else? Ran into pretty much all of my friends from high school, totally randomly, at the Soap Box Factory after the fireworks. Completely insane. Genevieve won one of the categories in the 10 second film festival, which caused me to start freaking out, which Dory heard. He found me, I found Gen and Alex, we went to Grumpy's, where we ran into yet another former comrade, Heather Boyer, who's boyfriend knows my friend Brooks, who was also there with my close homie Michael, who was Anna's first kiss. INSANE.
Now I am the spentest of the spent. But Emily Hagge is coming down tonite, and we are going to take it easy and hang out all weekend. Yessir.
There, I blogged.