Here are a few things I've heard/received at work lately:
"I'm never gonna get married because I'm BLACK!"
"A catalogue really would have helped me with my holiday shopping for all my little friends back on the mainland." (MAJOR WTF).
And at the tail-end of an apology from an employee for stealing from (our) employer:
"P.S. PLEASE let a sister keep her (store issued credit card)!"
Wow.
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